(check out more baby pictures here.)
It’s been three weeks today since the birth of my baby girl Azalee Florence Chittle! Happy 3 week birthday baby!
I haven’t posted since the birth for several reasons….
First, I have been processing it all and haven’t quite figured out how to fully reflect on the profoundness of giving birth and the first few weeks of being a parent. It has been kinda a mind trip for me….or maybe its just the hormones.
Second, my little Aza is happiest in my arms so I have not had much hands-free time to type blogs!
So I decided to CHOOSE LOVE by letting go of feeling like I have to blog and instead I have spent the last three weeks simply holding and loving my baby…..Like seriously I have spent almost the entire last 3 weeks in my nursing chair with her in my arms 🙂
There have been moments of overwhelm, tears, exhaustion, pain (who knew breastfeeding could do so much damage to your nipples!) and feeling trapped with no time for work or self care or kissing my husband. In some of these moments I will admit we have not always been able to CHOOSE LOVE and have been lost in fears, anxiety, or frustration.
Ian and I have also been struggling with giving each other what we need to feel appreciated and cared for during this transition leading to many conversations that will bring us closer in our new roles as parents.
In the moments that I am able to simply be present with my beautiful family, there is deep peace and love in my heart. The practice is coming back to this presence again and again….coming back to CHOOSING LOVE…..and doing so without judgement for how far I have strayed from this intention in any moment.
More reflections to come as my new mommy brain fog clears and I find more ways to get hands free time to type blogs 🙂